I cannot tell you how strange it feels to be writing this.
There are a lot of emotions that I can’t explain that have occurred during this project. Every day after school that I walked into the forest behind my house with my camera and tripod I was immediately relieved of my constant stress. There is something almost magical about being able to express yourself and creating art you are proud of for the first time.
On day 1 I went outside and took a self portrait with my dog, Cleo. As much as I hate looking back at my early work, I now realize that in that moment I was starting something life changing.
This project became my life, it engulfed everything around me. I learned to adapt to my surroundings and I experienced such incredible moments with such bright human beings that I couldn’t even fathom occurring on day 1.
This project was a healing process. I lost some friends, learned to appreciate the ones I have, and made new ones. I am just now grasping that I am no longer the person I used to be a year ago.
I am happy, genuinely happy.
I hiked to the tops of mountains, laid in tide pools, flew across the country (twice), walked on glaciers, ran through abandoned factories, jumped off sand dunes, froze in snow covered forests, and watched the sunset above Los Angeles. I have met my inspirations, and now they are some of my best friends.
I feel such a cocktail of expected emotions mixed with nostalgia. I never would have known that the year I documented would happen to be the best year of my life.
There are so many people that I owe thanks to, so many inspirational and outstanding people. I want to thank you all for witnessing a full year of my life. Thank you to those of you who changed it, there is not enough gratitude in the world for you. I was going to make a huge list, but you know who you are, you don’t need a tag to know that I love you all so much that I feel like my heart is overflowing.
I don’t know what is to come in the future, but I am certain about one thing. I am no longer afraid. I don’t ponder about what I might do later in life, because I’ve found my passion. I feel brand new.
I saw this orchard on the side of the road and I needed to find a way in, I couldn’t resist. My friends wouldn’t come with me, so I had to trespass on federal land, walk through a swamp, and avoid large rodents by myself while hauling all my equipment, but it was totally worth it. This place was amazing.
Tomorrow I am going to Portland to see The Naked and Famous. So excited.
This is for a collaboration I did with Eva! The theme was set to the song “I Will Possess Your Heart” by Death Cab For Cutie. She is amazing, and her stream is beautiful. Check her out.
I had some trouble coming up with ideas for this photo, and I took 4 separate photos until I got this one at 7 in the morning. When I listened to the song, I knew I had to do something with smoke or fog. Possession just reminds me of ectoplasm or something.
I had an entire fog machine under my coat and it was pouring rain. I was soaked and coughing from the smoke, but I am happy with this photo.
Big thanks to Eva for doing this collab with me! She is such an inspiration to me, it was a great experience.
This was one of the calmest shoots I have gone on. I was originally going to use the old barn that you can see in the background, but the grass out in the pasture was so soft, I couldn’t resist laying in it.
Anyway, I don’t have school tomorrow, and I have a really cool photoshoot planned. I’m excited.
My first time working in a studio, and my first time working with external lighting! This was so much fun. Christian’s cousin has a studio in town, and she let us use it. I had so much fun working with the lights and set. Christian and Hannah brought all of these amazing props, and they are actually all for sale on the Etsy store. They have an amazing collection of cameras and other really cool vintage things.
HUGE thanks to Christian and Hannah for modeling for me, and thanks to Serena for letting us use her studio. I will be going back tomorrow to experiment a little bit more.
I just got back from Eugene. Yesterday Tiffany and I went to the art museum. I have never been to one before (I live very far away from anything interesting). It was amazing. I saw so many amazing things, and even saw a statue of Buddha from the 15th century.
In one room there were just two red squares projected onto a wall. Very abstract I guess. The sign said no photography, because I guess the light was owned by someone. Oh well. Not the first time I have bent a few rules to get a photo.
(Uh for some reason tumblr is making this really pixelated. If you would like to see the higher res version go here.)